I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Randomize
