the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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