I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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