I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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