he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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