let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
