so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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