You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize