he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
