take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
