oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
im holly from the hills drunk
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
You need Xanax blowdarts
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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