A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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