I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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