you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
