i think my mom watched the whole time
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Randomize
