Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
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