Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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