Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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