guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
