Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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