He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
