That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Randomize
