Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize
