Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
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