This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Randomize