So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Randomize
