its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
