Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
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