she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
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