you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
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