mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize
