no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
There was a lot of him and a little penis
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize