just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize