For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
