So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
