How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
