I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Randomize
