Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
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