He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Randomize
