i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
