just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
