porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
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