Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Randomize
