the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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