Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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