covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Everything about him screamed your future.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize
