I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Randomize
