Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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