I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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