There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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