um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
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