Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Randomize
