i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
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